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N is for Nuts (If you are allergic! ****) O is for Open Fractures **** P is for Passive Aggressiveness (**** -- believe me the ED staff are better at this than you are) Q is for Quilts * (Avoid bringing things to the ED that will bring germs home with you -- we call these things fomites.) R is for Relations (Both * and #. Avoid bringing relatives that won't let you talk to the doctor. Pursue bringing relatives who can help make sure the doctor gets all the information.) S is for Stunts ** T is for Time #### (It's going to take a long TIME in the ED.)  G is for Grace (# for yourself and for others)
H is for Hydration # I is for Ice **** J is for Jesus (there are not enough #'s to stress this one) K is for Kittens (especially the bites **) L is for Large Livestock* and Ladders**** M is for Magic Mushrooms (**** no matter how "natural", nothing that alters your mind is harmless) If you wish to stay out of the ED -- avoid the * and pursue the #. A is for Alcohol **** B is for Bike Helmets ## C is for Common Sense #### D is for Drunk Driving **** E is for Ergonomics # F is for Friends (#### for good friends, **** for bad friends)  Bleach may not be able to cleanse away sins, but it has become a lot of people's best friend in the last two years. (Not my charge nurse's because she destroyed a pair of pricey scrubs with it. The bleach took all the germs out...but it also took out 95% of the color out.) From personal experience, here are some things the medical field recommends when using bleach: 1. Please do not drink bleach -- it causes chemical burns. 2. Please do not soak your skin in bleach (regardless of where the skin is) -- it bears repeating: it burns.  |
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September 2023
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