 Knowing about Jesus does not make you a Christian anymore
than knowing about Easter makes you an Easter egg. It's believing and following Jesus that makes you a Christian. And I have no witty comparison to an Easter egg... which is stuffed with sugar, fat, and calories. Wearing glasses does not make you smarter (though it may make others think you are smarter), any more than wearing cowboy boots enables you to ride bulls (though it may make others think can ride bulls -- which could be dangerous to your health).   It's been a fun week!
I dyed my feet blue (accident) I did something new (on purpose) And I learned from God, too! How was your week? 5. Forgetting what you can't remember. No more nagging premonitions. 4. I have too little energy to figure out how out of shape I am. (It's better just not to know.) 3. I don't have to worry about strange aches and pains anymore -- the doctor says they're normal at my age. 2. My knee starts bothering me, before my hip, my back, or my feet have time to get painful. Isn't that great? 1. I've gotten all these years to walk with God -- and we are just beginning.  If ED docs don't like being at work...why do they spend their free time doing things that may get them taken back to the ED as a patient? Things like rock climbing and skydiving. Isn't this rather like a lawyer trying to get sued while off the job?
1. Obvious bleeding, without a dressing of any kind. One of the basic rules of first aid is if it bleeds -- put pressure on it. This especially applies if you have amputated a body part. Not only do we not want you to bleed to death, but it makes other patients nervous to see dried pools of the blood on the floor.
2. Trying marijuana (or alcohol) prior to seeking medical attention for a traumatic injury. Then not only are you high or drunk while trying to describe what happened -- but if you delay too long, we can't repair that terrible leg laceration you got defending your cat from a werewolf. 3. Not even looking at the injury prior to arrival. We know, lots of people are squeamish -- and that's fine -- but find someone who isn't to look at your cut and at least see if it bled. We are more than happy to do this for you...but we charge a lot more. Medical professionals may find it humorous when they have to unwind a half-mild of gauze or remove a makeshift tourniquet placed to keep someone from bleeding to death from...a paper cut, but that is still preferred to first aid underkill. Examples of first aid underkill to be revealed next week...  It may look cool on TV, but please do not pit an avocado by stabbing the pit with a knife (unless you aren't that keen on continuing to have normal sensation and function in your hand). Instead here are five alternatives:
1. Pop the pit out from behind with your thumbs. 2. Scoop out the pit with a spoon. 3. Cut the avocado into smaller and smaller slices until you can easily remove the pit with your fingers. 4. Peel the avocado and smash it with a fork until the pit come free. 5. Avoid eating avocados. I admit the last one may be a bit extreme...but I am rather partial to moving and feeling all my fingers. 4. |
AuthorSame author with some fun, quirky thoughts to make you smile! Archives
December 2021
Categories |
RSS Feed