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Blessed are the masked, for they shall be socially accepted. Blessed are those who order take-out, for they shall support small business. Blessed are those who stay in-state, for they shall not be required to quarantine. Blessed are the quarantined for they shall not have to put up with human stupidity. Avoid news outlets and eschew social media, for great in the onslaught of misinformation and political agendas.
 For all the extra time during this pandemic – I thank you, God.
Thank you, God, for making me nearsighted – that way I couldn’t see the car accident we almost got into. Lord, thank you for statistics because if I don’t like one, I can always find one that I do. And I praise you, God, that I don’t know the future because then I would have even more things to worry about…unless I should be worrying about not knowing the future…should I be worrying about that?  Last night, I found myself thanking God that only He knows all my silly mistakes and wondered how many other funny thanksgiving prayers I could imagine?
Thank you, God, that this world is so crazy; it helps me understand heaven that much better. God, I am so grateful that my dog only has three legs so we can actually run at the same pace. Thank you, God, for my allergies. They make it possible for me to live in blissful ignorance of any illness until I have almost recovered. Father, thank you for calculus – it reminds me of my infinite dependence on You. Why is the word “repetitive” so repetitive? Whelmed means engulfed. So isn’t overwhelmed overkill? Speaking of which, overkill…if you are killed, aren’t you dead? How can you be over dead? If you are over being dead isn’t that just alive again? Worship is so appropriately named because it is a “ship” that takes one’s “worry” away. Rehearse has the word “hearse” in it. Why? When riding in a hearse is a “onetime deal”? If the word “praise” is mostly made up of the word “raise”, why is it taboo to raise your hands in praise in so many churches?  I’m done for today.
Oh, I changed my mind. Help! I can’t hear you. I tried my best but…  I missed that.
I’m not sure. I forgot. I’m lost. I can’t make it.  Masks could have changed Biblical history…
Would Adam have broken out in poetry if Eve had been wearing a mask? With a mask, would Saul have been more successful at concealing his identity from the witch at Endor? Would King Artaxerxes have noticed that Nehmiah was sad? Just curious… Sorry, I’m late…I got stuck in traffic.
I hope so. Just kidding! I feel like I’m forgetting something… That can't be done.  That was before my time.
Wow, didn’t see that one coming. Did I say that? I’m worried that… What am I doing? |
AuthorSame author with some fun, quirky thoughts to make you smile! Archives
November 2020
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