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...with your bodily orifices.
Sponsored by your local emergency department. 1. Magnets are easy to get into your nose (especially if you put one in each nostril) but very difficult to get out given the lack of space and the fact that physics is working against you. 2. Gasoline can be irritating and damaging to your skin...and your ear drums. It is generally recommended, you avoid getting it down your ear canal. 3. Speaking of ears, should you or your offspring choice to beautify your ear lobes or cartilage with jewelry, please follow the care instructions. Paying to have the piercing done and then paying to have the ED remove it when it becomes infected it is less than ideal. 4. I promise, a field trip to the Pumpkin Patch is not enhanced by a side visit to the ER to have corn removed from your nose. 5. Lip piercings...like other piercings... can become ingrown. Coming to the ED to have it surgically removed the day before your first professional job means your lip will be about three times normal size in your ID picture. At work we have a disposable coffee cup from (shhh!) Starbucks that now acts as a pencil caddy. But on the side it still says: Caution: The beverage you are about to enjoy is extremely hot. Isn’t that a lie now? ... That’s why God’s Word is so amazing: it is true forever.  Last night, I prayed:
"LORD, I will follow You anywhere." Then I thought to myself, "I hope He doesn't take me up on that." Hmmm....Maybe that is less funny than I thought. Being lost and being found, isn’t where you are or where you are trying to go. It is the knowledge of how to get there.  |
AuthorSame author with some fun, quirky thoughts to make you smile! Archives
December 2020
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