Aardvark -- I ask you: Why two As?
Accept -- Pronounced the same except it's spelled differently...who did this to us? Aunt -- Why is my mother's sister verbally reduced to an insect? Three is a crowd...if we are talking about people. But a group of ravens is an "unkindness" and a crowd of eagles is a "convocation". Cobras come in "quivers", porcupines in "prickles", toads in "knots", and kangaroos in "troops". The point is I think we need more creative names for crowds of people (but not like skunks who are called "a stench" or hippos, unflatteringly, referred to as a "bloat"). I guess we do have "conventions", but what about a "kindness", "pickles", or "bows"?
You can say something witty (which is an adjective). Or you may not care one whit (which is a singular noun). And you can live by your wits or be at the end of your wits (both plural nouns).
But what is a wit? Is it kind of like a whisker -- that you escape by? Or maybe more like a brain whisker...that way it could be singular and plural and a descriptor. Anyway, that's all the wit I have for today. Enjoy your week :0) ![]() If Sunday is the day for sun, what is Monday for? Why is Tuesday the third day of the week, shouldn't it be the second? If you sit all day Saturday, shouldn't you get married on Wed-nesday, and eat fries on Friday? And Thursday should be Friday or vice versa, because by Thursday -- I'm through. Anyway, enjoy your weekend everyone! W -- is for (what else?) wait. Wait in this line. Wait to walk through this gray box thingy. Wait at your gate. Wait in another line. Wait to get into your seat. Wait to get where you are going. Wait to get off the plane. And that's if you're lucky -- sometimes there is waiting on the tarmac. Waiting for crew. Waiting for a piece of luggage they think may have a bomb to be removed...oh yeah, I've done that.
X -- is for xtreme measures. Like patting down my hair to makes sure I don't have...some dangerous do-dad in my bun. Y -- is for yelling. And this I am optimistic about, it always makes my heart glad when someone else breaks down and yells, "California sucks!" before I have a chance to. Z -- is for getting some zzzz's. If you are a person who can sleep in an airport, I salute you! R -- is for "ready for take off". Four of the most beautiful words, that are not spoken nearly enough.
S -- is for safety first, security team, and strip search. But, the optimist says, TSA did let the 90 year old gentleman behind me leave his shoes on. But the real question is: Could he keep his belt on to keep his pants up and keep from face planting on the cold airport floor in front of cold airport stares? T -- is for time. How many hours of my life have been spent in a terminal? (Hey, another T!) U -- is for urgent. Go ahead, walk like a sloth in winter. Nothing is ever urgent in the airport. V -- is for victim. Every passenger is a victim to the whims of weather and whoever "they" is who cancels flights. L -- is for long lines. Period.
M -- is for mind-numbing boredom. At least they have taken down most of the TVs that used to play the same thing on a 15-20 minute loop says the optimist. True -- that was enough to make you loopy! N -- is for never again. This is what I tell myself ever time I escape an airport alive. O -- is for oxygen. I think it should tell us something when a conveyance is required to bring oxygen with it... P -- is for prayer. Airports provide plenty of time for prayer. Amen. Q -- is for quest. That's what it is to find the water fountain (or a sandwich that won't leave you homeless for the first night of your vacation). F -- is for finished boarding and you have missed your flight.
G -- is for gate. (I always seem to find the wrong ones -- how about you?) H -- is for "honestly, we have no idea when you'll get home". I -- is for injury after lugging all your luggage to the bathroom with you and doing yoga trying to find space to sit on the toilet. J -- is for jealous, which is what everyone is of the people getting off the plane on time. K -- is for...kind, I guess. All this stress does give people the opportunity to be especially kind to each other. (I thought this when I saw a young man let two older people cut in front of him in line...and then I realized he was just waiting for the rest of his party and trying to keep his spot at the front of the line!) The Pessimist's Airport ABCs...with Input from that One Incurable Optimist we all know :0)6/10/2022
A -- is for animals and accidents, such as dog fights between service poodles.
B -- is for broken -- like the landing gear. C -- is for crowds. (Of course, as the optimist points out this means more people to minister to and tell about Jesus.) D -- is for delays...which come in lots and lots of different flavors, but still mean the same thing. E -- is for empty -- empty your pockets, your wallets, and your minds. |
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July 2022
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